I have 2 words for Scott Savol - "Shut Up !!!"

Oh and I have 2 more words for him - "You Suck !!!"

Great finish to the Masters the other day. Tiger's putt on 16 hung like Danny Noonan's putt on 18 at Bushwood only Tiger didn't need Carl Spackler's help. Then Tiger proceeded to channel the pre-2004 Phil Mickelson for the next 2 holes. Dimarco's chip on 18 rimmed the cup and Tiger's putt on the first playoff hole would have gone 30 feet by the hole if it hadn't gone in. I hear the TV ratings were way up too.

Best part of opening day at Fenway may have been the fans cheering wildly for Mariano Rivera. You have got to love the Boston fans. They slayed the Dragon and now they are making fun of him too.

Time to get some of the old thunks out in order to make room for the new thunks of spring………thanks to Roger Powell, Jr. lighting up the 3’s in the 2nd half and Louisville being completely incapable of making any 3’s in the 2nd, my little thunkers will not be getting any new shoes this spring………the Knicks signed Jermaine Jackson a few weeks ago and promptly went in the tank – do you think that Zeke wishes he had signed Tito instead ???..............what does it really say about The Donald and the Trump Organization that he is actually going hire one of those idiots on the Apprentice………..3 weeks ago I was skiing on an empty mountain under crystal blue skies – today I buried under a pile of files in a crowded cubicle while smelling burned popcorn and my neighbor’s onion bagel – something is very wrong with this picture………..the Denver Browns ? certainly looks that way with all of the Browns D-Line migrating west – what the F*@# is Shanahan doing ?........David Terrell signs with the Pats – I guess that Belichik figures if he can tame a malcontent like Corey Dillon than he can tame the malcontent that is Terrell……..when did Mariano Rivera become Armando Benitez ?............saw the Incredibles on an airplane the other week and the movie was still great – can’t wait to get the DVD……..The Contender is must see TV – Stallone is high comedy and all the fights are edited to look like a Rocky fight – loved it last week when Anthony doublecrossed everyone and knocked out the ill-prepared religious freak……….Rob & Amber are making it very hard not to like them on the Amazing Race especially with all the hating being directed toward them by the blatantly gay couple……….still won’t buy a CD from any of the American Idol finalists at this point but Carrie Underwood is getting closer in my mind………Nashville Star is a much better showcase for talent as the people in this show actually play instruments and write their own songs – Leeann Rimes doesn’t even look half bad……Miranda Lambert came out of this show and she is the next rising star in the country scene – she’s cute too………..drove all the way to hershey to see a good hockey fight and both teams played like a bunch of chicken Swedes – what a waste of time & mileage…..speaking of Hershey, the limited edition Fudge Reese’s beats the you know what out of the Limited edition Nestle’s Crunch with Peanut Butter…..heard on the radio that the walkoff HR by Cincy against the Mets on Opening day was the first walkoff HR on Opening Day in Cincy’s 129 year history – same old Mets……..Stephenie is the only person on Survivor Palau that I like and she got stuck with the tribe of idiots – I hope she can pull it off tonight – she is a lock for an FHM shoot after the series (I may have said that one before)………I’m tired, my fingers are sore and it finally stopped raining in Augusta………don’t forget to tip your bartender and try the crawfish – Good night Mrs. McGillicuddy wherever you are…..

The other morning I was watching a hawk circle a paraglider against the backdrop of a bluebird sky - did I mention that I was riding a chairlift after my first run on an empty mountain ? How does it get better than that ?

The main reason that I watch VH1 Country is that I will never have the misfortune of seeing a J-LO video……….whoever in Hollywood thought it was a good idea to have Lindsay Lohan film a movie in New Orleans during Mardi Gras really needs to have their head examined……..Lamont Jordan is a great pick up for the Raiders - as a Bronco fan, I am officially scared………LOST continues to befuddle, intrigue and frustrate me - Locke, Hurley and Sawyer are great characters…….Martha Stewart is out of the Big House and is now in an even bigger house - 5 months of house arrest on a 150 acre estate ? As Martha would say, "That's a good thing."………can the contestants on this season of "The Apprentice" be any dumber or less likeable ?……….Derrick Blaylock is a nice pick up for the Jets and the signing of David Patten by the Redskins has to signal that Laveranues Coles is on his way out………while the $3.5B offer to buy the NHL is not exactly a great or realistic offer, it is a good negotiating ploy for the owners in their battle with the players………Cindy Brunson is ESPN News………I saw a hawk snag a rabbit on my way to work this morning - a little animal death is always a good way to start the day - perhaps it was an omen of things to come today…….Elvin Bishop's Live CD - "Raisin' Hell" - is my new old favorite CD. I must have had "Travelin' Shoes" cranked up to 11 on my speakers this morning……come to think of it, with Nelly and Tim McGraw doing a video together, can J-LO and the Judds be out of the realm of possibility ????……….Louisville is looking like a dark horse team for the Final 4 which means they will now probably lose in the first round of their conference tournament……Kobe settles his civil suit out of court - I wonder which cost more, the settlement or the I'm Sorry ring he bought his wife…..good to finally see a team in the Atlantic Division is finally 2 games over .500……..Jason Giambi walked twice and grounded out once - that just goes to show that you really don't need steroids to suck…..despite the snow on the ground, I can hear my golf clubs calling me - I just wish they weren't saying hacker, duffer and you suck…….a recent survey says that 25% of the work force is just showing up to collect a paycheck - what the hell is wrong with the other 75% ????…….that's it for today - don't forget to goose the coatcheck girl and do try the day old meatloaf - I'll be here all weekend…….

It's been too long folks and too many thunks have been bouncing around my old brain so here we go…….
Has there been a more forgettable Super Bowl in recent history ? I think the Eagles played but I'm really not sure………Great job by Muhsin Muhammad getting his $100m deal but who is going to throw him the ball ?????……….Was it any real surprise that Parcells signed another one of his old QB's down in Dallas ? I am sure there was a run at the ticket office when the cowpokie fans heard that Bledsoe was going to be their QB next year - how soon before Phil Simms gets a call from the Tuna ?……….and now Kerry Collins almost becomes a viable fantasy QB with Randy Moss in silver & black - all he has to do is drop back, chuck it long and wait for Moss or Porter to run under it - I can think of 2 games a year where it will kill me………….how scared was Minnie Mouse when she heard that Jackie Christie was coming to Orlando ?……….was there a song at the Oscars that Beyonce didn't sing ?………….I have lamented before about the lack of TV viewing at 5am but Erica Hill on CNN Headline News does help make things better……..she still only gets 4th place on my list of top morning news bunnies behind Juliet Huddy, Kiran Chetry and Contessa Brewer………speaking of Contessa Brewer, how happy is she that Amy Robach could only last 7 days on "IMUS in the Morning" ?……Chipotle Tabasco is the greatest tabasco invention ever…….back to the Oscars - didn't see a single one of the nominated movies - guess my opinions on the winners don't really matter but I was glad to see "The Incredibles" beat "Shark Tale"…………Chris Rock missed his chance to really zing when he said Rene Zellweger was going to gain 80 pounds for her next role as "Deacon Jones" Instead of saying "Star Jones"…………I would love to be on "The Amazing Race" but mortgages don't pay themselves………..I would love to be on "Survivor" too but I can't for the same reason………..I once bought John Elway a lap dance - I would love to buy a lap dance from Jennifer Garner……..it snowed again today so let me say it again - if you can't drive on snow then stay home………there is no team out there that looks like a Final 4 lock come tournament time - should make for some very interesting basketball pools……..Sean Penn should just lighten up before he becomes completely irrelevant in the eyes of the rest of America…….why would the Atlantic City Boardwalk Bullies of the ECHL move to Stockton, CA ????……….Isiah Thomas has made some dumb moves in his career and the latest two trades he made at the deadline just added to his resume……..Debbie Gibson is the latest C-List Celebrity to not show her bush in Playboy - this is happening all too often………I would be willing to put money down in Vegas that Tara Reid makes an appearance by November and they better make sure that she shows bush……..that's it for now - more thunks to come - don't forget to tip your waitress and make sure you try the veal - I'll be here all week

Not to degenerate into one list of Babes after another but my latest Top 5 List

Teri Hatcher
Jennifer Garner
Marg Helgenberger
Diane Lane
Juliet Huddy


and I can just feel a Tara Reid pictorial in Playboy coming by the end of this year

Hot Morning News Bunnies -

Kiran Chetry - Fox News
Juliet Huddy - Fox News
Michelle Charlesworth - WABC
Natalie Morales - MSNBC
Lauren Glassberg - WABC
Melissa Stark - MSNBC
Betty Nyguen - CNN
Susan McGinnis - CBS
Carol Costello - CNN
Contessa Brewer - MSNBC
- and making a dark horse move like Juliet did this summer......

Game 1 of the ALCS went to the hated yankees last night but you have to think that yankee fans are lot more worried about the way their team won Game # 1 than Red Sox fans are worried about the way that their team lost......Pedro just needs to cut out this Daddy fixation of his and pitch a solid 7 innings.............the Broncos are just one Q fumble away from being a perfect 5-0 while still playing less than impressive football so far - have to give the ball to Droughns this week so he can pound away at the old & slow raiders def line...........Shark Tale was a horrible movie except for the Rasta Jellyfish - I hope I never have to see the Sponge Bob movie and Robots just looks like a bunch of Robin Williams butt jokes..........I'm in way over my head in my two non-profit jobs but I guess that I will eventually figure out what in the hell I'm actually doing...........I need to make a big pot of alligator stew and some pumpkin bread this weekend - I also need to start planning a tailgate menu for the harvard game - that sounds pretty stuffy but it's not...........No NHL is bummer everywhere except my wallet.......a brick red house ? I must really love my wife..............the one chick I think is cute on Survivor actually would rather be ogled by cute chicks...........I really need to get back to writing my novels - I have far too many ideas busting about in my head - at least put together a children's book or two - I'm pathetic if i don't do it soon...........LSU vs Ole Miss - Broncos vs Saints - cafe au lait & beignets - good weekend coming..............

Can I possibly be any more bored than I am right now ? Stuck in a 4 day sytems seminar for a system I will most assuredly never use. Not even any scenery to peruse. This is painful. Thank God for the back row and internet access.

Tampa Bay sweeps the Habs - Calgary dumps the Wings - 2 series down and Game 6 in the other two series tonight - Predictions: Avs in OT to force Game 7 and Leafs 4 Flyboyz 2

Too many thunks going on these days - NCAA Tourney - picks go boom - went to maui - Visa bill went zoom - pinched a nerve in my hip - ouch - survivor all stars - the robfather looks strong - AI3 - got to pull for Jasmine but I'm not picking up the phone - new job - new commute - no morning newspaper - need coffee but trying hard not to have that 2nd cup - gator burgers come today - that's all I have time for now.....

It's about time that Slats stepped down as coach but he should have given up the GM mantle as well - he has made a mess of this franchise and he should not be in charge of the March 9 Fire Sale at MSG !

Bobby Brown is in jail again ? What a surprise......not ! Bobby & Whitney are like a wreck on the side of the road. You can't help but slow down to watch but you are damn glad that it's not you. What a waste.

Clinton Portis for Champ Bailey is enough to, as my friend Nate said, throw up in my mouth.......

How happy was Derek Jeter to play Jerome to A-Rod's Morris Day at the press conference today ? I can't see this working in the long run.......

I know my wife is right when she bugs me about finishing one of the children's books I have written. I just can't seem to take that final step and begin the rejection process. I know that they are good enough I just don't believe in myself enough.

Last night I shook hands with Rod Gilbert, Steve Vickers, Dave Maloney, Nick Fotiu and Adam Graves. Graves was awesome in that he took time to shake every kid's hand, pose for pictures and sign autographs all while patiently trying to get to his seat.

Brian Leetch's wife is going to be serious MILF once she becomes a mom.......

Tonight the NY Rangers will honor Mike Richter and raise his #35 to the rafters. It is a well deserved honor for which I will be glad to be present. I was in Denver in 1988 when Richter made his professional debut with the Colorado Rangers of the International Hockey League. I watched him make me forget his forgettable Olympic performance as he won 10 straight games. I remember calling my brother at the time and telling him that I had seen the goalie that would finally win the Rangers the Stanley Cup. I was also there in June of 1994 when Mike Richter did carry the Rangers to their first CUP in 54 years and I gladly reminded my brother that I had told him so. I remember watching his Canada Cup performance in 1996 when he lifted an overmatched American team onto his back and carried them through to victory over Canada in the finals. I was there to see the shot ricochet off his head to fracture his skull and I was there when he sustained the concussion that ended his career. Mike Richter was a hell of a goalie and has proven in every way to also be one hell of a man.

I hope to see him up in the Lake Placid region someday.

Pitchers & Catchers !!! Pitchers & Catchers !!!!

WHO CARES !!!!